PRIVATE!

What is this fascination with privacy? People always say, “I’m a private person” as an intro to why they were offended by something that was asked, or as and excuse to say no to something, or just to seem mysterious (that is my vote for why people say that).

I’m not private. I Never have been. In fact, I’m the queen of too much information. I’ll tell you everything, short of my bank account number and routing number. I won’t respond to the phish email requesting my passwords and stuff, but I’ll tell you if I started my period this morning, or if I’m in the bathtub when I talk to you on the phone, or if I am having a tough day, or if I’m having a kick-ass day and why. I guess if that wasn’t ok, I’ve already offended and scared off the people that don’t want that information so I won’t worry too much about it.

Maybe I should work on being more mysterious. I mean, really, I bore myself. But that seems so hard. I can imagine it now…Jennifer, can you help out with the blah blah committee to blah blah tomorrow at 11? Why no, I can’t tomorrow. I have an appt. Its A Dr’s appt. *pause* Ok, its my annual pap smear and hopefully I’ll get that mammogram! But probably not, cause I’m still nursing an almost three year old! Gross, huh? I know, I never would have thought…but he’s my last. And its been so good for him. So, yeah, no mammogram for me still! Oh, you know, that appt is at 10 and I might just be done by then, so maybe I can come for the last part? Oh, ok, I’ll try and be there. Oh, but I’ll have to leave early cause I want to hit the gym for that new soul groove class. Gosh, its so fun. You should try it! ……….and on…….and on…..and on…..

Nope, I’m not private. I’m a big fat open book. A really thick, informative, and somewhat superfluous book.